Back to the IV's

Looks like this will be a daily thing for the next few weeks. Today was awful I had to get 4 pokes before they could find a vein. With all the throwing up and my famous hard to find veins anyway, they had a horrible time. I have bruises and super sore skin. I balled on the first one so hard the lady was literally stabbing around searching for vein. Eh... Finally got it in on 4th try and they are keeping it in until Wednesday to avoid the MESS. Morphine hit me hard today, but I helped overall. I got steroids and any nausea fluids and morphine.
They prescribed me so more thrush medication and a nausea patch since my last prescription is STILL to be filled for lack of apprival. I love my state care. No you don't really need that they say. B called to see how much it would be $1000 bucks for the bottle. W O W. Anyway I was able to a few minutes ago drink a chocomil with one pain pill. I hope it helps! So far no nausea... (fingers crossed) They had to bring in another nurse to find vein and she couldn't get it in 2 spots so then the original nurse got it in on my hand and she said," ahh thank Jesus sometimes I do that with these really though calls." If they couldn't get it in I can't get any pain relief. They are considering putting a pick in my arm. They do in a short extended period at the hospital, so they don't have to keep stabbing me over and over. Sigh, whatever helps I tell them. I'm at 136lbs. 16 more to not be considered overweight. And I still feel so much smaller.

Tossing my cookies...wait I haven't ate a cookie since early October!

Been sick since yesterday afternoon. I asked the nurse for a anti-nausea medicine she called it in. The pharmacy called me back and said they need special approval from my insurance so it may be awhile. Within the next hour I cannot stop puking. I can't hold a thing down (water, pain meds, and even tea). I finally stopped at 1:30 AM, was able to sleep. Being off of all pain medication my mouth was on fire, the vomit is so very harmful to my mouth sores. NOT FUN. B just rubbed my back and gave me lots of napkins to wipe up. He was so supportive. I started to cry towards the end of the night, it's just so darn painful and it reeks havoc on your body which convulses over and over again. I just want to be done.

Went to bed finally, woke up at 1pm and showered so slowly I have absolutely zero energy. I went to the bathroom number 2 that was good. Then I threw up another 3 times while getting ready to go to radiation. Got there they checked my vitals my pulse was high, blood pressure ok. Doctors decided to admit me into the chemotherapy suite, to get fluids, morphine, and 2 types of nausea medication. All of that given through an IV. Before that I completed my regular radiation therapy. The IV hurt like crazy, but all the relief after made it totally worth it. I was loopy the whole day, got home slept until 9pm.

I am slowly sipping my tea. Thinking about my crazy day. I am nervous, I know this is bad but according to my docs the worse pain peaks 10 days after I am done with radiation. Not looking forward to that, but when that happens I will truly know it's gotten as bad as it will get now here comes my sweet relief!

9 more sessions to go!

I almost done with radiation! My last day is December 1st, unless I double up on a day. I am hurting SO much more lately it feels like there are cuts all over my tongue now. Shakes are harder to get down now. I am taking 1 oxycodone every 3 hours to help out with pain. I haven't doubled up yet, I'd feel way to loopy. It freaks me out to be that out of it. My hair has fallen out in back more, especially on right side. Skin on my face is dark, burnt, and peeling. It's also pretty itchy. Here are some photos. . . . ALMOST THERE!

Went to the LION KING!

It was amazing. No amazing isn't enough, MAGICAL. I cried and laughed and loved every minute of it. From the amazing costumes, beautiful singing, and incredible music. They had this wicked congo solo, that made me think of my dad. And the costumes where incredible mom would have loved that! The biggest shocker was how close our seats were, 6 rows from the front right in the middle! Man Brandon out did himself! It was a perfect evening, I wasn't hurting at all. I snuck in my green tea and took some meds 1/2 way through. We got a free gorgeous program and a hat with ticket purchase. Plus Brandon bought me a T-shirt! I am so incredibly thankful to have had this amazing experience in the midst of all this pain. SO HAPPY!

... sigh

I had a blast with my mom here, the week flew by. She came from Friday night until Thursday! It was so nice, my feet are baby soft and my family was overfed all week. Brandon was thrilled, great meals all day long. Brandon's family came up too, it was so nice. I felt very special having all these wonderful people come and visit me. Also my dad came on Wednesday and that was really great too I haven't seen him in awhile. They both got to see my radiation mask and the chamber room. They seemed pretty emotional about it, I can't imagine. If I saw my girls in something like that, it'd break my heart :/

I have been really sore the past few days, it hurts all the way down my throat. Hurts to swallow, this is new. I have had some tough nights, I wake up in terrible pain. I am on a break right now, the doctor recommended a 4 day weekend break from radiation so my tissues can heal. He said the next few weeks are going to be TOUGH. I also met with my original ear, nose, and throat doctor and he prescribed some extra thrush medication that dissolves on my tongue. They make me gag though. What doesn't at this point? :) Almost done. Almost done.

My MOMMIES here!

Life is good, my moms here.

I am doing pretty good, taking laxatives and pain pills. Currently eating some soup with oysters crackers. It kinda tastes like play-do :) all in all I am doing pretty ok. Doctor says I need to put more cream on my face its kinda dry. Its hot to the touch, similar to a sunburn. He also says its crunch time, and I may need a break sometime soon. A four day weekend for my tissue to have some extra time to heal. Though they add the treatment day to the end of my treatment. It made me kind of nervous to hear it'll be getting worse here pretty soon.

I AM ready for this to be over, so let the CRUNCH begin...

Pain has Plateaued

Doing better, I can speak a little. I can eat some soup, and I stopped losing weight. I'm at 145 lbs. My skin is starting to peel and I have lost quite a bit of hair the last 2 days. But I have tons left, you can barely tell. Not that I care about that at all. I told B, "take the hair, less pain is worth all of it."

The last few days I have slept in until 1pm, that's pretty lazy. Its easy to sleep and mornings are more painful for some reason. I keep reminding myself not to clench my jaw it hurts after awhile. My mom will be here Friday, thank goodness. I miss being babied, and Brandon's Grandma and Aunt are coming Sunday. It will be a great weekend.

3 WEEKS LEFT! My last day of radiation will be the day before Thanksgiving!